Posted by paulrivas on:
Rivas Cultural Services received a remarkable inquiry last week when Charles Moreno requested recommendations as to how to brush up on his Spanish in preparation for hosting two Mexican professional soccer teams. Señor Moreno is the grandson of Mexican immigrants and enjoys tequila and beer. Rivas Cultural Services is half great-grandson of Mexican immigrants and half other stuff, or only 50% as Mexican as Sr. Moreno and 50% more removed from the fatherland.
The culturist suggested Sr. Moreno incorporate the Mexican telenovela of his choosing into his weekly television regimen and loaned him the Lonely Planet guidebook series Mexican Spanish Phrasebook. The handy little paperback was donated to Rivas Cultural Services by the celebrated Mexicanist and life artist Bubba Ray Robison, a Texan.
In discussing his Spanish study, Sr. Moreno claimed to be unfamiliar with the word habitación as used in the book in reference to asking for a room and was surprised to find that the word cuarto was not used. Rivas Cultural Services assured the short and dark Sr. Moreno that the latent Spanish speaker in him must have at one time been cognizant of the words habitación (hotel room) and recámara (bedroom) as well as the more general cuarto (room). Sr. Moreno replied, "Simón, güero."
Pleased with his progress and dedicating himself anew to reacquiring his ancestral tongue, Sr. Moreno requested a soccer-specific assignment, whereupon Rivas Cultural Services advised Sr. Moreno to investigate the differences between a gol, a golazo and a golazote.